An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

james hedge is gay did you know if you look at him you turn gay

1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

Knock knock. Come right on in.

Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

There was once a man who lived in a box.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Neglegence and irresponsibility of a farmer.

What did the blade of grass say to the other blade of grass? Nothing, as grass does not have the capability of speaking and does not have a brain, all it has is a complex life system where it feeds off water. If it were to say anything though, it would say, "Hey! We're both blades of grass!"

Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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