What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats the difference between anti-jokes and regular jokes? A Fridge full of dead babies being thrown at a black man with no arms or legs swinging from a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Jew, A priest and a Muslim go into a pub,put their differences aside and have a good time!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock The doors already open

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the mute boy get for his birthday? i dont know he didnt tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the worst part of being a black Jew? That is a very uncommon combination of race and religion, therefore causing obvious confusion.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops