What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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justin beiber sucks

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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why does the man appear fat he is

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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