I asked a girl on a date. She said no.

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What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

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Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

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When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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Your momma's so fat that she went on a diet.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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I need to start studying.

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

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10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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what do you say to a black guy on steroids? B!tch please

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops