What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ( The chicken says) I dream of a world where a chicken can cross the road without having morals questioned.

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot. what do you call a woman flying a plane? 9/11.

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

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knock knock go away!!!

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Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops