What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

Why did the girl run over the road? Her buttons rolled to the other side! (From a book called... Al-capone does my shirts) (Natilie)

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

How do prevent a black man from robbing your house? Lock you doors and perhaps get an up-to-date security system.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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