when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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It's gone. It's all gone. There's nothing left.

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AND

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Someone born in the 1970s feeling self-righteous about defending the victims.

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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What is the name of Steven Hawkins condom.... Anti virus

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a man offers an innocent little child some candy from his van upon arrival the child is raped and beaten suverily. -teagan doherty-

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A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What do you call a black man riding a plane? A black man riding a plane.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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What's worse than finding a worm in the apple you're eating? Many things could be worse than that, from the less severe e.g. Finding half a worm in the apple you're eating to the more severe, such as the total collapse of civilization.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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