What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

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what would happen if american army lost their air supprt ? lmao

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Hey, dude, wanna hear a joke? Sure... Pussy. ...I dont get it... Exactly! HAHAHAHAHAHA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops