What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So a man walking down a nature trail came across an injured fox laying on the ground in pain, it looked like it was attacked recently. There wasn't much the man could do at the time, so he gently picked up the fox and rushed the fox to his house. The man arrives moments later at his house with the fox. There were a lot of options the man could choose, but he went with a simple recipe. The man grabbed a knife and gutted the fox, removing all unnecessary organs. He then skinned the fox of it's fur. He sliced the head off, cut the legs to a stub, and stuffed it. He gave it a nice seasoning and placed it in the oven at about 350F for 6 hours. When the fox was perfectly cooked, it was taken out of the oven and left to sit for about 5 minutes to cool. He cut a chunk of meat from the dish and sat down to eat. "What a fine meal" the man said.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the black man say to the other black man? We both share the same ethnicity

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing, because they clearly never made contact with each other, owing to the fact that Osama was born approximately 13 years after Hitler had committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

have you seen Stevie wonders car? No Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is 9+10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops