It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

Why did the chicken cross the road... so people could keep asking that question for 4000 years

Who is big and stupid My brother

I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

Little Timmy enjoyed school He went to Sandy Hooks

who is jacked and looks like a beast? • James Cornish

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

Why did the boy stop working on a farm? His country became more economically developed.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

Phew... it's gone.

How do you scare a brunette? Hide behind a door or wall until the unsuspecting person walks by, then jump out and yell.

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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