my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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Prostitution is bad.......

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Sarah Palin's political campaign

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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I am quite mature.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because they weren't invented when he was alive.

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Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

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What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops