What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

ccjcjcjcjcjcjjcjcjcjjcjcjcjcjcjcjccjcjcj why

why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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