Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

Yo momma is so fat, that after boarding an airplane the flight crew respectfully asked her to deboard, as with her on board the plane would be exceeding the reccomended weight, and thus be unable to fly safely.

How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

why did Michael Jackson cross the road? He didnt he is dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

WILLYS

What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

If you watch a pregnancy backwards, it is about a baby that is inserted between the legs of a woman and is slowly broken down for energy and the remains are finally sucked up by a man's genitals. There isn't a joke.

what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...