Your gay

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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hi, my name is zack, i have a boner from the girl to my right(;

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

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I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

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are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

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I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Why do black people like watermelons so much? They don't. It's just a stereotype.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would depend on whether it wanted to or not. If it did want to, it could potentially chuck an infinite amount of wood in its lifetime

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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