Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

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Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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Why was the man sad His got raped

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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woman's lacrosse

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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what did the man say to the other man when he saw a dinosaur look.

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Yo momma is So Fat? And isn't your cousin Chow Yun Fat? I think I know some of the Fat family. How are they all doing?

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How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

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what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

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Why can't february march Because april may

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops