Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the shed I'm gonna screw you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jamie Oliver eats a chip

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why couldn't the blonde change the lightbulb? she couldn't find the leperchaun at the end of the rainbow

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops