Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

A: Knock knock B:The door is open.

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

Who row's? •Liam Findlay

A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

What do you call a black man on your front porch? -Racism is a serious and non humorous problem.

what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because they weren't invented when he was alive.

whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

... Chan chan

"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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