Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

chinga tue madre Ryan

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is pink and gets wet a tounge

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was billy bad at telling jokes? Billy was sexually abused as a child and humour was never really part of his life

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the vegetarian order for lunch? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's got four legs but can't move by itself? A chair.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops