What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence in prison.

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mikey is cute

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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Why does Joel's breathe smell?

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What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

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Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

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Whats worse than 4 dead babies in a bucket? finding an actual joke on Anti Joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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