What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops