your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Evicted.

Why could'nt Susie talk? The mafia cut out her tounge

why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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