What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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Tilt your screen back .

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

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What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Disabled.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

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What's the difference between a nutcracker and a can of tomato soup? Oh... I don't know, I was asking you.

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Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

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why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

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Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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