A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

Right now I'm walking down a road shoot car rhendhhdgfgdyxchdhsggggggggggggggggggggggggg

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

How do you cure aids? Jonathon siezed to care as he proceeded to cry when he was told his lemons were over the weight of what he'd expected

I've got 99 problems and they're all stressing me out and causing me to be very unhappy.

What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

What did the cat say at his mother's funeral? Nothing. He was too grief stricken over the loss of his beloved guardian.

What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

Alright alright... But you gotta promise to call me then

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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