A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

To be, or not to be. That is not the question. The question is, what time is it?

Are you Jamaican? Because your dreadlocked hair is an iconic symbol of one who would be from the country of Jamaica.

Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

A 16 year old girl went into a bar. The police realized she did not have an ID, and arrested her.

I man was taking a major shiit He forgot to wipe

Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

why did your mom make food to feed the killweeds.

What happens when 2 gay men rub their penises together Jello

A bar walks into a man

Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

Why did Brooke go to the bathroom? She had to pee

Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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