why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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Oh and Nero, what are you suffering from? Is it dangerous? Are you dying or something? Please dont scare me like that again.

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

A Fat Kenyan

What did the zombie eat for breakfast? You. You fell a-sleep

Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

What happens if u call a black kid names? He tells an adult and u get in trouble

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

Roes are red Violets are blue I have a potato Let's make pie

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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