To mamma so fat..............nuff said

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

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How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

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A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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A man jumped off a cliff. He died.

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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