What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

Your mums a potato

Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

Horse.

That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

what did steven hawking say to the prostitute? Nothing, he is unable to speak, he needs help from his word speaker thing.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

Why was the Africanan boy hungry? Because food is hard to come by in Africa.

Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? were lawyers

Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

911 jokes are just plane wrong

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

alert("Hello");

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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