Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

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I was gonna clean my room. But then my mom did it.

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whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

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What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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Basically

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

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How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

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Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Why did the african kid die He was mauled by a tiger in a zoo

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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Your sex life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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