What did Tom get for his 5th Birthday ? Nothing, he died when he was 2 years old

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

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Thanks superman! Oh this is just what a regular Clark Kent would do... Uh... I mean... Dont worry Superman I know you arent Clark Kent, I just wonder why you work for him all day... Moral: What? What moral? What what?

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

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So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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Why couldn't the Chinese women see... It's because she just got into a terrible car accident and suffered a rental detachment in both eyes. Follow up question, why was the Chinese women even allowed to drive?

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

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1

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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