What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

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Why am I sad right now? Because I just Sh*t my pants.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

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DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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Whats fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? Theres twenty of them

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What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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What happened to the young baby after her mother died It grew up got a collage degree and had a great life growing up with her dad and visiting the cemetery every year

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You Know what worse than having 10 Kids? Having Eleven

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What did Robin say to Batman before they entered the Batmobile? "Batman, I'm a necropheliac."

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

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haha

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

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Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

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What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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