A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

2 Black men walk into the bar.. Guess what? There still black.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Batman tell Robin when they got to Gotham City? -Robin, we got to Gotham City.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't Timmy ride his bike? He didn't have a bike, his family was very poor and did have much money. Therefore a bike for Timmy was the last of their concerns.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats green? Mountain Dew.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down +6

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...................... Wats so funny?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the dog say to the astro turf? SHUT UP!! I don't want to here your excuses, put the dishes away when you're done with them or so help me! You see the dog had been abused as a puppy and as a result he was always a bit off.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops