I was gonna clean my room. But then my mom did it.

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Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

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why did the blond have a broken nose? because she was brutaly beaten by five rapists when she refused to have sex with them.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

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why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

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What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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What do you call a Fat man? You call him by His name because that's the polite thing to do.

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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how do you get rid of diahreah? Shove pepto bismo up your butt.

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You wanna see something really scary?

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Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with buck teeth? Lucky to have teeth.

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

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The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops