How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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- Knock, knock - Who's there? - Police - I'm not home!

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I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

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Knock knock Who's there? What are you, blind?

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If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

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Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

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What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red... That depends in how hard you throw them.

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How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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Women's Rights..

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

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April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

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What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

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What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, because if it's black and white, it can't be red.

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what did the guy say when his partner took a poop on his chest? It was unnecessary for you to deficate onto my chest. In no way at all was that sexually stimulating, and i shall consider seeking out a new partner.

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Why did the little boy cry? He fell down the stairs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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