So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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if a dog eats a hot dog what will happen? (leave a comment to find out)

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Four blondes are driving to Disneyland, as they finally got to Florida, they read a sign that said "Disneyland: left" so they turned around and headed home.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

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What did the blonde say when she saw a box of cheerios? "Lovely, I think I'll have some of these for breakfast today. The wholegrain will be good for me."

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How did the idiot die? He comitted suicide because people were picking on his stupidity. (If you laughed at this you are a horrible person)

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Q: What is black, white and red all over? A: Interracial sex during the time which the bible has decreed as abhoration.

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Why is a chicken coupe, a coupe not a sedan? Because a sedan would have four doors.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

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What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

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y u no like me joke?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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what do you get when you cross a rhino and a chicken? well, if you're unlucky and too close too the chicken, salmonella if you provoke the rhino, impaled

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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