whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

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The global news

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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Are you one of those gay rapists that flame around telling people no all the time?

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Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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Whats, red, blue, green, yellow, feels like popcorn, looks like jello, tastes like hydrogen peroxide and smells like burning logs? i dont know. i was asking you

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

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Asshole huh? Dont give me any ideas. Again you are not high on weed are you? Then that's really bad.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

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A blind man walks into a wall.

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Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

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A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

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What do you call a Chineses filled with bus?

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*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops