What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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As I was riding my bike down the road, I saw a young boy being raped in a dark alley way. I proceeded to pedal and acted like i had seen nothing.

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Q. Why did the television set turn on? A. Because someone pressed the power button.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

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What's the difference between chili and a urologist? One is hot and spicy and the other analyzes urine.

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Why was the kid hungry? Because he lived in Africa.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up which puts resistance on his arms and therefore strengthens his arm muscles and performs physical exercise.

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Shea's sty....

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why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

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Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

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why did the chicken cross the road it didnt

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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So what have you overcome? I mean I know alot about you, but little about your personal deeper self, with that said, you telling me you are some kind of X-men when it comes to genetics?

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He lost his punch line. -by Ross

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

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what do you call a monkey? a monkey

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The Earth is a nice place to live.

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What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

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There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops