A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

thumb_up thumb_down +15

are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

thumb_up thumb_down +15

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did billy get after sex? Herpes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Jason's Wife said to him I love you before I left to head to work, Jason then went back inside to see no one was there and he remembered his wife died in 2009.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when you cross a rock and a paper bag? A rock inside of a paper bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops