If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

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That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

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How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

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Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

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You Know what worse than having 10 Kids? Having Eleven

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

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What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Once there was a frog. My parents died.

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When you have read this, you've already read it.

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a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

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Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

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A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What will it be?" The homeless man says, "Nothing. I have no money."

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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