whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

A frog goes to a lake. he meets a photographer , the frog ask him ( can you take a picture of me? he says: sure ...say cheese.... then the frog said :....yogurt

I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

This Anti-Joke is funny. haha.

Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

outside your comfort zone

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

whats worse than being payton johnson being black

Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

Why are pineapples yellow? 82, piano, bomb, lamp!

Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

what did your mom say when she did crack? i am so f***ed up its not even funny, i mean, i literally screwed the racoon in our back yard. i certainly remember a lot of drugs and alcohol. i am pretty sure i raped your friend, billy. I also went all lezbo on your girlfriend. i murdered your brother. he was telling me to stop, so i lit him on fire and made him eat cigarettes. the very abusive mother was then charged with murder, rape, possesion of illegal drugs, assault and several other charges involving that one crazy night. refrigerator.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

Why did the little girl die so suddenly? The bullet got her right in the heart.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

What do you get if you cross a football with Theo Walcott? A goal kick.

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An extremely talented reptile.

An Englishman walks into a bar.

What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...