Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went. The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed. Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint. "Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister. "Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over." The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That's okay," said the man. "We're not welcome in Home Depot either."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black man walks into a bank with a gun and askes where the safe is then procedes to shoots 3 white men inside of it. Everyone thanks him for stopping the armed bank robbers and he lives out the rest of his life in happiness for he is a hardworking cop and risks his life to save others.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where did susie go after the explosion? everywhere. What was susie after the explosion? a puzzle.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A Dyslexic man went to a posh, bought a badnana, and put it no his neck, and lawked around twon.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why cant white guys jump? Well that would be wrong because some can. Have you seen Blake Griffen?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Did you just fall from heaven? If not I'm gonna beat the shit out of you

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Ted: Joe, do you think I'm dumb? Joe: No, I think you're Ted.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops