What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

I would write a racist joke, but racism is offensive

This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

Haiku's are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

Why do dogs bark? Idk why? Cause there dogs

knock knock whose there? my penis.

What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

Jose gutierrez is a gay fish.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

Your mom is so fat..., that she died of a heart attack at an early age and everyone mourned her greatl

=3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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