roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

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Wanna hear a funny anti joke?...........................................................................................Funny anti joke

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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What's the warmest organ in a dead baby's body? My penis

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

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Black people being friendly.

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Tic tac toe. I never met my father

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what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

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Q: Where did Sarah go when the bomb exploded? A: Everywhere.

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A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

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what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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A lawyer met with his client and said.. well, there is some good news and some bad news The bad news is that you're going to prison for life.

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What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

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A couple is playing chess. The man then chokes his wife to death, throws her body in a woodchopper, and eats her like cereal- Frost

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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