Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

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Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

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A cricket walks into a bar and the bartender says,"Hey, we have a drink named after you!' and the cricket says,"Oh really? You have a drink named Joe?"

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Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

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Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? this overused joke

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What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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What do you call a gay Mexican guy who is deaf, has no arms, no legs, and is bald? Whatever his name is.

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What did the horse with herpes say to Paul? Ney

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Five people all from different backgrounds get in a car and nobody get's raped.

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender--TOAST

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What's the best thing about shrimp? It never goes bad.

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What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

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black people

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two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

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name one thing that is impossible!! A sober irishman

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What is a pirate's favorite color? It depends on the pirate.

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Have you heard about the angry chef? He beat his children

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a blond and a brunet jump of a bridge who hits the ground first ....... the brunet because the blond has to ask for directions

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If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops