in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

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What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A godless abomination that violates every ethical standard known to man.

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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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What's even funnier than 24? A clown in a tree.

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A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Wtf?

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what's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings what's worse than 2 bee stings? the Holocaust. what's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings

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what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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