When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

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You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

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What's worse than getting a F on your History test? The millions of children around your age that cannot even afford to go to school, most likely because they live in a third world country.

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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j

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A blind man watches TV

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Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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The world blows up and everyone except for one man and his house make it out alive "Knock knock" "Whos there?" "Me" "Me who?" "Ummmm, its me, duh" It turns out the man was very bored and decided to go knock on his own door and tell knock knock jokes

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What's black, white, and red all over? Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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ROSES ARE RED VILOIT ARE BLUE MY NAME IS MISIMOA AND I SMELL LIKE POO

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Once upon a time, there was a man. He was black. The end.

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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I told my doctor I’m the first man on the face of the earth to suffer from morning sickness. He promptly corrected my mistake; my excessive vomiting is actually caused by chemo.

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Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

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A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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