How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

How do you make a professional gamer cry? You burn his house down.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

Whats worse than peeing blood? Dying.

What do you call a deaf-black man that professionally generates maps of the world? A cartographer.

Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

Paddy Englishmen, Paddy Irishmen and Paddy Scotsman walk into a bar. They realise that they all share a common name and make a casual joke about it.

Guest what? Dog

A unicorn, a smart blonde, a dragon, and a hobo are in a maze who gets out first? The hobo. The other 3 don't exist. By Adam Chebali

How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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