What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he needed to get to the other side and he was using a crosswalk

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A Mexican, German, and a black man walk into a bar... They promptly exit due to the access amount of tobacco fumes in the air.

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Whats Yellow And Cant Swim A Bulldozer.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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What's old and has wet pants? My grandma with a bladder problem

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why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

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here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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You might be a redneck if someone slaps you on the back of the neck.

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A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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Laugh.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

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why didn't the boy get any presents for his birthday? because when his dad went to the store to get him some presents he ended up buying presents for himself like a huge douchebag.... and the apple doesn't fall from the tree so his son is a douchebag too and doesn't deserve presents.

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What did one dolphin say to the other after watching a banana dance with an afro. My pancreas was replaced with a mango.

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What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

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Who's looking for judicial toenail clippings?

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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