What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My dick

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo Mama is so stupid, she believes in God. While her faith has absolutely nothing to do with her intelligence and in 2014 only the most bigoted and stupid people would demean people based on their religion,she does have an IQ of 65 and is therefore believed to be mentally inadequate. It's really quite sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When I find out where you live I'm going to burn down your house, kill your family, and while your crying in you demise I am going to slit your throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do an Eagle and a sugar cube have in common? The fact that if let to disintegrate they both turn slowly to hydrogen after a period of time.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A muslim walks through a medal detector before the entrance of the airport terminal. The alarm goes off and he is arrested by TSA officials, they open his jacket and find 30lbs of high explosives.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is about the size of a sausage, flesh-colored and looks like a penis, if you illuminate it with a flashlight on monday nights? - a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red leather is black when god made you he was smoking crack

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

knock knock whose there tim tim who just kidding its fred

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man breaks into a car, he doesn't steal anything because that would a violation of the car owner's privacy.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you call two indian men lying next to each other? i dont think there is a name for it but im sure you call them by there names.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Suzy:I love you like a fat man love cake. Dave:(proceeds to say nothing as he is fat and is buzzy eating cake)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A ghost walks into a bar. Nobody sees it because it is a supernatural entity.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what has wheels and can fly and is purple? A plane i lied about the color purple

thumb_up thumb_down -9

my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops