What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

why did jenny get 22 turnovers in a basketball game? because jenny has down syndrome

Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

Today, my friend threw a lemon at me very hard and hit me in the testicles. FML

one bright morning in the middle of the night two dead boys got up to fight back to back they faced each other drew thier swords and shot each other a deff policeman heard this noise came and shot the two dead boys if you dont believe this lie is true ask the blind man he saw it too

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

Lisa: Omg Karen, just had sex with Ben, his weiner was sooo tiny lol. Ben: I think you sent me the wrong text.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

seek beauty

How do you make a black person mad? Set his house on fire.

Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

It's gone. It's all gone. There's nothing left.

how do demolish a building alkekwhakbar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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