Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Women's Rights

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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do u like chicken ? ....no good...cuz its for black people.

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what happened to the atheist when he died? he went to HELL

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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Whats brown and slippery? A brown slipper.

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why was the black mans shirt ripped? because he escaped genocide in africa

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What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

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squash squash who squash my ass

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What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website?

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops