A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

What do Black people call their fathers? Dad.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

What do you call an Arabic man flying a plane? A Pilot.

Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

You know what sucks ? A vacuum.

I used to get on Facebook, then someone asked me to save a child in Africa by liking a picture of Jesus or ignore it and go to hell

Two blondes walk into a bar, but they are then puzzled as the door would not budge open for them.

why did the physics major drop out of college? because he stumbled onto a finding that made him contemplate life so much that he needed to go to africa to study where the source of the finding where he later caught AIDS from an infected village person, he was later flown back to the US where he was cured out of a miracle but later hanged himself because he was not allowed to go back to africa and find out the meaning of life.

What do an elephant and a grape have in common? Well, depending on your ideological views they are either both God's creations or two examples of species which have evolved over time. That is all.

*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

Today, my doctor discovered I had a tumor in my brain the size of a walnut. FML.

What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

What's worse than HIV? AIDS -Bob Bobby

what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

How do you call two black men on the moon? Astronauts.

What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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